Mixed-Status American Families Are Living in Constant Fear of Being Torn Apart

A newly released report from American Families United (AFU) sheds light on the profound emotional, medical, and financial strain endured by U.S. citizens married to immigrants — a crisis described firsthand by the families living through it.

AFU surveyed 227 mixed-status couples and found that 80% of U.S. spouses fear they could be separated from their partner at any moment. Others have already been divided across borders or pushed into exile in order to stay together. Many surveyed say current immigration laws offer them “no path” to remain united in the country they call home.

The numbers reveal only part of the story. The lived experiences behind them show the depth of the ongoing human toll.

A Husband Detained Despite No Criminal Record

One U.S. citizen recounted how her husband was detained by ICE even though he had no criminal history. The trauma of losing him, she said, “broke [her] heart — both medically and metaphorically.”

Left to care for their children alone, she struggled with her own heart condition as well as her son’s epileptic seizures — medical issues that became nearly impossible to treat after the family was forced to leave the United States. “I needed medical care that was not accessible in Brazil,” she explained. She ultimately had to return to the U.S. without her husband after 18 years of public-service work at home.

A Family Uprooted and Pushed Into Exile

Another woman shared that she “lost everything” while trying to keep her family together. Because of her husband’s immigration case, the family moved to Brazil — a decision she never imagined making, but one she felt was the only way to avoid permanent separation.

Life abroad came with serious challenges: lack of adequate medical care, worsening health conditions, and financial strain. She emphasized that remaining united came at a steep cost, but it was the only option the system left them.

A Survivor of Abuse Left Raising Two Families Alone

One speaker described surviving abuse in a previous marriage before building a stable family with her current husband. Together, they legally adopted four children. After he was deported, she was left to care for all four children on her own — while also taking in her sister’s four children.

Caring for eight children without her spouse has been overwhelming, she said, yet she affirmed she would “do it over and over again,” underscoring the love that drives her fight

to keep her family whole.

Caregivers Living With Constant Fear

Another U.S. citizen explained that she and her undocumented spouse take a relative to monthly chemotherapy treatments, all while living under the constant threat that her spouse could be taken away.

AFU describes these situations as part of a “largely invisible crisis” affecting hundreds of thousands of American families.

‘A Policy Choice’

In the report, Amanda Ribeiro, a U.S. citizen, nurse, and mother, spoke to the systemic forces driving these separations. Her family was split apart despite following all available legal steps.

“My family’s separation was not inevitable — it was a policy choice,” she said. “And no one benefits from American children growing up without their father.”

These stories are a reminder that defending family unity is not only a matter of policy, but a moral and spiritual responsibility. In these times, we are called to stand with our immigrant brothers and sisters in Christ — and with our fellow U.S. citizens fighting to keep their families whole — because no family deserves to live in fear or be torn apart.